[ It’s a simpler creature than that, for Shadowheart: she doesn’t trust people. Didn’t trust Stephen and Tony before their bonds, and now—
It scares her how much she needs them. Saber, too, only gaining any clarity around that need when she’s away from him, but that comes with its own pain.
Everything hurts, and it hurts that Tony’s been opaque about the parameters of whatever this is with her and Stephen, while Bob’s allowed something like clarity. A boy who’s been told he can say no to them before she’d ever asked for anything. ]
Right. What do you imagine our “whole thing” to be?
[ so he’s pointedly not thinking hard enough to imagine anything. like, are you still married if you die and resurrect, or — ]
i already got a master but she’s an executioner, so they have her busy all day this way, if i’m doing stupid errands for him, other people can’t make me do worse and i’m not stuck kneeling and going out of my mind waiting for orders
[ which is, he thinks, heroic in a small way, like yelena taking the time to be kind to him in the vault. he won’t forget it. plenty of people haven’t tried to help the tenders. ]
the last thing i want to do is cause problems for him
no subject
It scares her how much she needs them. Saber, too, only gaining any clarity around that need when she’s away from him, but that comes with its own pain.
Everything hurts, and it hurts that Tony’s been opaque about the parameters of whatever this is with her and Stephen, while Bob’s allowed something like clarity. A boy who’s been told he can say no to them before she’d ever asked for anything. ]
Right. What do you imagine our “whole thing” to be?
no subject
none of my business
[ so he’s pointedly not thinking hard enough to imagine anything. like, are you still married if you die and resurrect, or — ]
i already got a master
but she’s an executioner, so they have her busy all day
this way, if i’m doing stupid errands for him, other people can’t make me do worse
and i’m not stuck kneeling and going out of my mind waiting for orders
[ which is, he thinks, heroic in a small way, like yelena taking the time to be kind to him in the vault. he won’t forget it. plenty of people haven’t tried to help the tenders. ]
the last thing i want to do is cause problems for him