[ i think maybe it’ll take longer for you to do the things to me that i do to you. maybe not, when embry begs so easy. prettier than bob did on his knees at the commune, twice fucked in the head by the void and this goddamn place. all embry’s done tonight is make promises he probably has no intention of keeping, but bob likes to hear them anyway. likes him so much. too much already. bob likes him even though he knows that embry wouldn’t have let him stay. the lie just feels like the truth to him now, surely, falling from his lips in desperation. ]
I am touching you. [ quick, rough, the way bob likes to be touched, too. thumbing wetness from the crown of his cock to slick the way. straying, only briefly, to drag over his perineum. a tease that isn’t going anywhere tonight. ] You don’t have to do anything.
[ the inverse of what he said at the pound, high on ego and adrenaline. i don’t have to do anything. a vast improvement on the original line, in his opinion, with a higher purpose — embry unspooling like so much thread. anything more than this would be an advantage taken and regretted, he thinks, after the awfulness of the night.
(and bob would hate to appear on embry’s list of regrets again so soon, however inevitable his placement is.) ]
I’ll let you come. [ more earnest than commanding. bob cants his head to recapture embry’s mouth. all teeth and tongue, hungry for what he can’t keep. ] Just like this.
[ with a hand stroking through his hair and pumping his cock. with bob’s weight pinning him down, holding him steadier by increments. only easing off when embry gives that final jerk, to let him take his pleasure and release all that pent-up, rattling energy against his hip. ]
[ only cut off by bob’s mouth, which embry reaches hungrily for, teetering on the searing edge of pleasure while bob’s hand works him over, hard enough and soft enough both. like he knows him. he does know you, and all too fucking well now. so why is he still around? his breath trembles out of him, a hot pulse of pleasure, and then he’s coming so hard that he can barely make a sound, a soft keen moving raggedly up his throat. it’s like slowly shedding a weight, like something painful being sheared away. a vise easing around his lungs. his fingers close around bob’s wrist, holding tight, slowly stilling his hand as his hips rock into him and then stop. his heart flutters rapidly, nerves alight and alive.
it’s easy, so easy to get caught in this. in bob’s sweet mouth and ocean-deep eyes, the way he’d stay right here, soaked and shivering, if it meant he could keep kissing him. what’s not easy? everything else. don’t leave me isn’t easy when there’s still some ripped open part of embry’s mind that wants to run, that still thinks of the overwhelming control of the sentry and how that fits into the void. how all of it fits into bob, whose complexity is miles of broken glass, each fissure leading somewhere new and entirely unpredictable. a smile, a laugh. the hurt shining in his eyes. a vicious anger as potent as his own, only bob is both the powder keg and the match. his fingers slide down slowly, loosely twining their sticky hands. ]
Bobby. [ he releases an aching breath. doesn’t want to break this bubble, not yet, not when he wants to fist bob’s cock, wants to turn him over and fuck him right here on the wet marble floor. twice now, bob has saved his life. maybe three times, if he counts him leaving after pulling him into the void. another breath, this time tightening their hands. ] I’m going to tell Ash what happened. Greer, too. All of it. They’re not going to spread anything about you around. I just want you to know that — I’ll lie to anyone else about this, but not to them.
[ he believes in what he says, but it still feels like shit to think that he might be hurting bob with his words. that he will hurt bob, again and again, with the truth. he looks at him, his eyes a lucid blue, almost as clear as glass. ]
You know what happened between Ani and I. And I think you know her pretty well. [ the old, familiar guilt, still as sharp as a star. i know her better, he wants to say, which would be a lie, because the vivid life he remembers with her wasn’t real — and yet if it wasn’t, why does their hurt linger, festering like an infected wound? it’s the hurt that makes him speak up. ] I’m not leaving you, so don’t accuse me of trying to end this again. But I am going to tell you that you’re going to hurt Ani with this. With me. Don’t — I don’t want you to say anything. I don’t expect any kind of answer. Not now. Just know that I get it, if you need to get off the ride. Just say okay. Okay?
[ eyes imploring, his hurt a dull thing behind them. it will hurt, when he loses bob. but for right now, their hands are still entwined, and he’s still close enough to kiss — and he does, softly, deeply, with a promise behind it that he knows he can’t keep. ]
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I am touching you. [ quick, rough, the way bob likes to be touched, too. thumbing wetness from the crown of his cock to slick the way. straying, only briefly, to drag over his perineum. a tease that isn’t going anywhere tonight. ] You don’t have to do anything.
[ the inverse of what he said at the pound, high on ego and adrenaline. i don’t have to do anything. a vast improvement on the original line, in his opinion, with a higher purpose — embry unspooling like so much thread. anything more than this would be an advantage taken and regretted, he thinks, after the awfulness of the night.
(and bob would hate to appear on embry’s list of regrets again so soon, however inevitable his placement is.) ]
I’ll let you come. [ more earnest than commanding. bob cants his head to recapture embry’s mouth. all teeth and tongue, hungry for what he can’t keep. ] Just like this.
[ with a hand stroking through his hair and pumping his cock. with bob’s weight pinning him down, holding him steadier by increments. only easing off when embry gives that final jerk, to let him take his pleasure and release all that pent-up, rattling energy against his hip. ]
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[ only cut off by bob’s mouth, which embry reaches hungrily for, teetering on the searing edge of pleasure while bob’s hand works him over, hard enough and soft enough both. like he knows him. he does know you, and all too fucking well now. so why is he still around? his breath trembles out of him, a hot pulse of pleasure, and then he’s coming so hard that he can barely make a sound, a soft keen moving raggedly up his throat. it’s like slowly shedding a weight, like something painful being sheared away. a vise easing around his lungs. his fingers close around bob’s wrist, holding tight, slowly stilling his hand as his hips rock into him and then stop. his heart flutters rapidly, nerves alight and alive.
it’s easy, so easy to get caught in this. in bob’s sweet mouth and ocean-deep eyes, the way he’d stay right here, soaked and shivering, if it meant he could keep kissing him. what’s not easy? everything else. don’t leave me isn’t easy when there’s still some ripped open part of embry’s mind that wants to run, that still thinks of the overwhelming control of the sentry and how that fits into the void. how all of it fits into bob, whose complexity is miles of broken glass, each fissure leading somewhere new and entirely unpredictable. a smile, a laugh. the hurt shining in his eyes. a vicious anger as potent as his own, only bob is both the powder keg and the match. his fingers slide down slowly, loosely twining their sticky hands. ]
Bobby. [ he releases an aching breath. doesn’t want to break this bubble, not yet, not when he wants to fist bob’s cock, wants to turn him over and fuck him right here on the wet marble floor. twice now, bob has saved his life. maybe three times, if he counts him leaving after pulling him into the void. another breath, this time tightening their hands. ] I’m going to tell Ash what happened. Greer, too. All of it. They’re not going to spread anything about you around. I just want you to know that — I’ll lie to anyone else about this, but not to them.
[ he believes in what he says, but it still feels like shit to think that he might be hurting bob with his words. that he will hurt bob, again and again, with the truth. he looks at him, his eyes a lucid blue, almost as clear as glass. ]
You know what happened between Ani and I. And I think you know her pretty well. [ the old, familiar guilt, still as sharp as a star. i know her better, he wants to say, which would be a lie, because the vivid life he remembers with her wasn’t real — and yet if it wasn’t, why does their hurt linger, festering like an infected wound? it’s the hurt that makes him speak up. ] I’m not leaving you, so don’t accuse me of trying to end this again. But I am going to tell you that you’re going to hurt Ani with this. With me. Don’t — I don’t want you to say anything. I don’t expect any kind of answer. Not now. Just know that I get it, if you need to get off the ride. Just say okay. Okay?
[ eyes imploring, his hurt a dull thing behind them. it will hurt, when he loses bob. but for right now, their hands are still entwined, and he’s still close enough to kiss — and he does, softly, deeply, with a promise behind it that he knows he can’t keep. ]