[ and if he knows armand and about these other vampire places, then he must have some inkling about what it is a vampire is, or at least how their sort behave. all the same, he doesn't rummage around in the guy's head too much, he's tried to be a little more respectful. however, the fact that bob is trying very hard to avoid thinking about armand doesn't help the fact that louis feels like he's been hit in the face with it. ]
He's told me about his lapses in memory, yes. [ but now he wants to know more about bob, even if he won't press. not now, he'll speak with lestat and armand first. ]
And said you were staying with him to assist - we usually have dinner together every week or so.
[ forgetting what “dinner” means, in this context — ]
That’s really nice. [ utterly sincere. ] I don’t have to mess with your guys’ routine, if you want me to kick rocks that night. [ though there’s a zip of curiosity, spiking on the ekg. ] I’m just trying to help, and Armand — Armand thinks it’s a good idea. [ his first one in a while, or at least the first one anyone has listened to. ] Y’know, like how people do observation in the hospital?
[ a sliver of memory: his time in the pediatric ward. the girl in the bed beside his, whose parents actually visited her with gifts and flowers and friends. ]
[ as an afterthought, ] Everything’s scarier on your own, anyway.
[ though they all are, in their own right. armand more alone perhaps than louis is now, with lestat so near, but the three of them are building a tenuous and careful foundation for what they are now. ]
What happens if it turns out he might be beyond your level of help? Beyond what you can handle in those times?
[ the memory lapses. louis thinks idly of a time where he'd been crippled with madness, hallucinations, fear. (as if that's fully left him). how dangerous he could be, how deadly. ]
Sure. [ casually, ] But, uh, I asked if he was hurting and offered to help. And he said yes.
[ did you ask? did anyone? because if they didn’t, he was alone. everyone knows death comes at a price here, if they’ve been around long enough. all it took was the sight of embry suffering by his lonesome to wonder if armand was similarly afflicted.
more sure of himself, then. ]
I’m invulnerable, so. [ mental shrug. ] Not worried about me. And I’ve got all the stuff he can do, plus some extras, if he tries to do a runner.
[ telekinesis, thermokinesis, super strength, speed, flight — choose your fighter. ]
I don’t think I can fix it, but I can keep him safe. I know I can.
[ it’s what i’m for. golden god, guardian, sentry. ]
[ complicated, the thing between he and armand. love in its own right, but painful. a wound that will take another century to truly heal, but they've worked on it. trust, patience, understanding - it's hard to come by. a protective thing in him baring its teeth seems to calm, hackles raised only at the edges now.
no, louis didn't ask. not truly. they've never been good at asking one another much of anything, but they find one another. they always do.
the pressure louis places on bob's mind eases, though he keeps the dark, strange thing he's sure he felt tucked away for now. ]
Invulnerable. Huh. You test that here?
[ interesting. but the says it with confidence. he wants to press at it, threaten it, see what he can coax out of the guy but - ]
This place doesn't always let things go as planned, even if it would where you came from.
Big time. You guys trying to bite me is like when kittens gnaw on your hand.
[ evidence gathered at the pound, training with wanda and bucky. to a degree with armand, unintentionally, when it was clear the void could overpower him, if it so desired. that it almost has twice now, and the second time, if bob hadn’t been awake —
he laughs, and the sound itself surprises. ]
Man, I only have powers ‘cause nothing went the way anyone planned.
[ louis thought he might come into all of this thinking that this kid was nothing more than some wishful thinker, that armand could easily over power him and make the idea of protection a fool's errand. but there's a sort of candor to bob that louis didn't expect, and there's an honesty in the strange power he feels somewhere in his mind that lets him settle.
louis snorts in return. ]
We're alike in that way, then. I don't think any of us end up this way because we planned to.
[ a beat, then: ]
If anything changes and you need help, let me know. His safety is important to me, and if he's accepted your help, then your safety is as well.
I will. I know you guys are — I’m like a thirty year old kid to you. I get it.
[ compared to decades together, a lifetime within their span of tens, hundreds. not to mention that his main credentials, besides being bulletproof, amount to trying one hundred ways to get fucked and forget. ]
I mean, might be nothing happens, right? A lot of the time people don’t have any episodes while under observation because you’re not stressed, right. [ that’s why he’d been fine at the tower, warmed by the sun and safety therein. ] So it’s better if more of us are looking out for him whenever we can.
[ seventy seven years with armand and it’s still such a small drop in the bucket comparatively but it’s been nearly a half of his vampire life. it’s easy to lose sight of that. ]
But you’re right. Nothing could happen and all this won’t matter. Gotta hope that’s gonna be the case.
[ a sigh. mentally and physically. ]
You’re welcome to join our dinner nights, but might want to warn me in advance. Least I could do is make sure there’s something for you to eat, too.
Right, yeah. [ a beat, in which he attempts to communicate via gesture, but, y’know, telepathy. ] Sorry, I was doing a hand thing. French guy.
[ on caroline’s list of vampires. didn’t come up loads during the murder game, maybe on account of being french? ]
Sure. That, that could be controversial, I guess. [ pineapple on pizza… human beings alive or dead… similar… ] It’s really nice of you to offer. I might not, uh, be that interesting? Just warning you.
[ it is probably stupid to worry about seeming dull and uncultured in front of ancient vampires who are drinking human blood, but. ]
[ louis shouldn’t be so quick to show his cards or be so loose with his mind as there’s no doubt bob may get the briefest image of the blond vampire. he’s on louis’ mind a lot these days. ]
He’s a lot.
[ fondness. ]
We all have different ideas of what it is to eat, but it’s a safe table for you to sit at, kitten fangs or not. Lestat and Armand will probably argue over a dust bunny or the color blue or the exact time of day. We can talk while they bicker - they’ll be interesting enough for both of us.
[ increasingly aware there is no escaping girl (vampire) dinner as part of the shovel talk slash vetting process.
and that flash, the golden feeling that wells up with it, tells him a lot, though it also has him wondering when something qualifies as a double date. also, can louis feel the same thing, when he thinks of armand? was that aspect of their relationship mentioned, when armand said bob wanted to help?
— and does louis know all that the second it occurs to him? an open book, his pages fluttering for anyone to rifle through. (but for the inky shadow, at the back of his mind. an amorphous, unintelligible shape. the sense of something more, looming over the rest.) ]
Okay, yeah. [ psyching himself up, ] Yeah, I can do that. And I eat basically anything that isn’t, uh, what you eat.
[ not a great example, to answer what bob thinks in the echo chamber of his head. he'd come into this rifling and searching, warded off by the creeping, looming dark at the back of it all. a strange thing - not baring teeth or showing its claws, but with it a sense of danger all the same. ]
That's the last I'll look - you think loudly, but it makes you honest. I won't reach without your permission moving forward. Can you get into my mind? That one of your extras, too?
[ jesus christ, that’s embarassing. bob rubs his temple with two fingers. recalibrates. ]
Kind of? But it’s — tactile. If I touch you, uh, anything could come through. No matter how deep you’ve buried it, so. Careful when you pass the potatoes, I guess.
I came here expecting to find someone that couldn't be trusted.
[ feels better to be honest, anyway, considering he's just had a listen in on his thoughts. he tries to ignore all others, but the emotions still come across. he'd open his mind to him now, if it weren't for the creep of that dark, curious thing in the boy's mind.
all the same - bob will feel a wave of shame, the closes thing he can get to a mental apology. ]
[ trust has to be earned and re-earned again over time, fuck-ups, high stakes shit. ]
It’s — I mean, I don’t know why I’m being like. [ another fidgety gesture louis can’t see, meaning avoidant. ] You can probably see it in there, right? It kicked Koby to the curb, when he went spelunkin’. Guess you and Armand both have hall passes.
[ a pause, for that to settle. koby’s powers are known and understood to be quite strong, so maybe that gives louis a better indication of what he’s dealing with. (and a possible theory as to why creatures that have accumulated lifetimes of pain would be welcomed into the snare.) ]
Armand says it looks like scar tissue. I think of it as, as my shadow. Got a teacher to see if there’s any — working with it, but for now, uh, it’s a little. A bit of a hostile situation?
[ clearing his throat. ]
Anyway, it’s looking for what hurts. The stuff you can’t forget.
I see it. Feel it more, though. Not showing me its teeth, but it's not exactly friendly, either. Can't say I'd be any different if you went spelunkin'.
[ but it does mean he opens his mind a little, cautious. if it tried to kick back koby, then he's curious. curious enough to know what could hurt those he loves, and what bob has that could protect armand at his worst.
there's no pressing, but there's the faintest acknowledgement to the dark, swirling thing there at the back of bob's mind. like knows like when it sees it, in a way. ]
Scar tissue makes me think it's dead, or healed. Your shadow feels more alive than that. Especially if it's going out looking for things all the time.
[ you know what they say about the void. look too long, and it starts staring back. even from afar, connected only by a. mental tether, louis will feel watched. might see the shadows shifting in the corner of his eye, the dark growing long with the light of his attention cast upon it. ]
Yeah, uh, turns out there’s a lot to eat around here.
[ for a vampire of another kind. and it’s had — adam’s grief, embry’s sorrows, corry’s past — armand, armand, armand — all in addition to bob’s own agonies, trotted out as and when it fuckin’ suits. maybe it’s more alive than it was in november, even with the horrors of the commune nipping at its heels. maybe it wasn’t so close to bob back then, but now it’s right there, overlaying his frame. ]
[ maybe louis should fear whatever stares at him, whatever grows and stretches and yawns under his scrutiny. it's strange to look at the void and feel as though he's seen it before, an eerie familiar friend. funny, to want to reach out and shake hands with something that feels like nothing and everything.
it's brief, the sound of an air raid overhead, or the feeling of dirt in his earsnosemouth as he hid from the sun, the way blood made him run colder then. it comes as quickly as it goes. ]
There's no shortage.
[ a huff again, something musical and easy, put on. ]
Pretty sure you said our fangs won't make a dent, so I think I'll stick to having you as good company instead.
[ bob feels the memory more than he hears it, rattling through his bones, pounding in his ears. an offering? or another stolen fragment, hoarded by the slinking, seething thing within. pain to taste, if not to eat.
the lack of fear in louis both surprises him and doesn’t. armand had been the same — is the same still. bob wonders if they don’t want for it sometimes. the shard of glass in hand. the pressure on a bruise. fingers in an old wound. proof of life, in the agony. bob can understand that instinct, after honing it himself all by his lonesome. ]
Hah, I’ll take that deal. [ with a light laugh, the darkness recedes. ] And be on best behaviour, promise. Keep the shadow and the, uh, sun to myself.
[ the two sides of him, light and dark, as armand likes to put it. ]
[ the darkness feels like a open window, and as soon as its gone, louis feels an unshakable chill as the glass latches shut. light and dark indeed. but he presses something warm against bob's mind - unnamed and unexplained, but a meager attempt at comfort, understanding. ]
No one ever warned you about making deals with vampires, huh?
[ a snort, more genuine now that he can breathe a little. ] Best behavior's not mandatory at these things, so best not to worry about it. You'll see for yourself.
[ seriously, wait until you get to see all three of them in a room together, bob, so normal! ]
[ it’s a trick armand does, sometimes, like a blanket around his shoulders. kinder than he deserves. appreciated, nonetheless, all the more for being familiar. ]
You think good judgment got me here? C’mon, Louis.
[ suped up with uncontrollable power, walking into a dinner with three apex predators — nah. if the sentry trial hadn’t snapped him up, he’d probably be the kind of idiot who begs to be made a vampire. or at least the guy who takes that ill-advised trip to a second location and ends up in a ditch. ]
I’ll try to, uh, read the room. [ a teensy burst of nerves. ] Am I supposed to bring anything? Never been to a dinner party outside Portia’s.
You can try to read the room if you want, but I'd say just hang on for the ride. All depends on what gets them going - last time was the music in the lounge. Vampires have very serious opinions.
[ or more that lestat and armand pick and poke and claw at one another until it escalates. usually louis just sits and watches, or placates one over the other. ah, his ill-tempered lover (ex-lover? lestat. ill-tempered lestat). ]
Just bring yourself. It's not a party so much, just a way for us to keep in touch. I'll make sure the kitchen gets us a spread.
[ another flush of warmth that feels far less supernatural and infinitely more human in a way that vampires shouldn't. but it's there - like a grip of a hand on a shoulder, a soft squeeze and shake, the bump of an elbow to an arm. like two men walking side by side down the sidewalk in the sun. ]
Speaking of - go eat something, it's past lunch time.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ and if he knows armand and about these other vampire places, then he must have some inkling about what it is a vampire is, or at least how their sort behave. all the same, he doesn't rummage around in the guy's head too much, he's tried to be a little more respectful. however, the fact that bob is trying very hard to avoid thinking about armand doesn't help the fact that louis feels like he's been hit in the face with it. ]
He's told me about his lapses in memory, yes. [ but now he wants to know more about bob, even if he won't press. not now, he'll speak with lestat and armand first. ]
And said you were staying with him to assist - we usually have dinner together every week or so.
no subject
That’s really nice. [ utterly sincere. ] I don’t have to mess with your guys’ routine, if you want me to kick rocks that night. [ though there’s a zip of curiosity, spiking on the ekg. ] I’m just trying to help, and Armand — Armand thinks it’s a good idea. [ his first one in a while, or at least the first one anyone has listened to. ] Y’know, like how people do observation in the hospital?
[ a sliver of memory: his time in the pediatric ward. the girl in the bed beside his, whose parents actually visited her with gifts and flowers and friends. ]
[ as an afterthought, ] Everything’s scarier on your own, anyway.
no subject
[ though they all are, in their own right. armand more alone perhaps than louis is now, with lestat so near, but the three of them are building a tenuous and careful foundation for what they are now. ]
What happens if it turns out he might be beyond your level of help? Beyond what you can handle in those times?
[ the memory lapses. louis thinks idly of a time where he'd been crippled with madness, hallucinations, fear. (as if that's fully left him). how dangerous he could be, how deadly. ]
He is very powerful.
no subject
[ did you ask? did anyone? because if they didn’t, he was alone. everyone knows death comes at a price here, if they’ve been around long enough. all it took was the sight of embry suffering by his lonesome to wonder if armand was similarly afflicted.
more sure of himself, then. ]
I’m invulnerable, so. [ mental shrug. ] Not worried about me. And I’ve got all the stuff he can do, plus some extras, if he tries to do a runner.
[ telekinesis, thermokinesis, super strength, speed, flight — choose your fighter. ]
I don’t think I can fix it, but I can keep him safe. I know I can.
[ it’s what i’m for. golden god, guardian, sentry. ]
no subject
no, louis didn't ask. not truly. they've never been good at asking one another much of anything, but they find one another. they always do.
the pressure louis places on bob's mind eases, though he keeps the dark, strange thing he's sure he felt tucked away for now. ]
Invulnerable. Huh. You test that here?
[ interesting. but the says it with confidence. he wants to press at it, threaten it, see what he can coax out of the guy but - ]
This place doesn't always let things go as planned, even if it would where you came from.
no subject
[ evidence gathered at the pound, training with wanda and bucky. to a degree with armand, unintentionally, when it was clear the void could overpower him, if it so desired. that it almost has twice now, and the second time, if bob hadn’t been awake —
he laughs, and the sound itself surprises. ]
Man, I only have powers ‘cause nothing went the way anyone planned.
no subject
louis snorts in return. ]
We're alike in that way, then. I don't think any of us end up this way because we planned to.
[ a beat, then: ]
If anything changes and you need help, let me know. His safety is important to me, and if he's accepted your help, then your safety is as well.
no subject
[ compared to decades together, a lifetime within their span of tens, hundreds. not to mention that his main credentials, besides being bulletproof, amount to trying one hundred ways to get fucked and forget. ]
I mean, might be nothing happens, right? A lot of the time people don’t have any episodes while under observation because you’re not stressed, right. [ that’s why he’d been fine at the tower, warmed by the sun and safety therein. ] So it’s better if more of us are looking out for him whenever we can.
no subject
[ seventy seven years with armand and it’s still such a small drop in the bucket comparatively but it’s been nearly a half of his vampire life. it’s easy to lose sight of that. ]
But you’re right. Nothing could happen and all this won’t matter. Gotta hope that’s gonna be the case.
[ a sigh. mentally and physically. ]
You’re welcome to join our dinner nights, but might want to warn me in advance. Least I could do is make sure there’s something for you to eat, too.
no subject
[ having forgotten what vampires eat because he’s off the menu, louis’ invitation reminds him. ]
I mean. Maybe a one-off? I don’t wanna crash your thing… Is it just, is it just you guys?
[ or do, like, all the vampires hang out? all the supers kind of hang out. ]
no subject
our home, Lestat.
[ the idea of sharing a meal with all the other vampires makes him laugh though. a complete disaster. ]
We’ve learned vampires are different in every world and others have differing opinions on the ethics of our meals.
[ lol talking like a man who hasn’t argued with both of his exes over the same thing, whoops. ]
We spend most of our time talking.
[ sort of. ]
no subject
[ on caroline’s list of vampires. didn’t come up loads during the murder game, maybe on account of being french? ]
Sure. That, that could be controversial, I guess. [ pineapple on pizza… human beings alive or dead… similar… ] It’s really nice of you to offer. I might not, uh, be that interesting? Just warning you.
[ it is probably stupid to worry about seeming dull and uncultured in front of ancient vampires who are drinking human blood, but. ]
no subject
[ louis shouldn’t be so quick to show his cards or be so loose with his mind as there’s no doubt bob may get the briefest image of the blond vampire. he’s on louis’ mind a lot these days. ]
He’s a lot.
[ fondness. ]
We all have different ideas of what it is to eat, but it’s a safe table for you to sit at, kitten fangs or not. Lestat and Armand will probably argue over a dust bunny or the color blue or the exact time of day. We can talk while they bicker - they’ll be interesting enough for both of us.
no subject
and that flash, the golden feeling that wells up with it, tells him a lot, though it also has him wondering when something qualifies as a double date. also, can louis feel the same thing, when he thinks of armand? was that aspect of their relationship mentioned, when armand said bob wanted to help?
— and does louis know all that the second it occurs to him? an open book, his pages fluttering for anyone to rifle through. (but for the inky shadow, at the back of his mind. an amorphous, unintelligible shape. the sense of something more, looming over the rest.) ]
Okay, yeah. [ psyching himself up, ] Yeah, I can do that. And I eat basically anything that isn’t, uh, what you eat.
no subject
[ not a great example, to answer what bob thinks in the echo chamber of his head. he'd come into this rifling and searching, warded off by the creeping, looming dark at the back of it all. a strange thing - not baring teeth or showing its claws, but with it a sense of danger all the same. ]
That's the last I'll look - you think loudly, but it makes you honest. I won't reach without your permission moving forward. Can you get into my mind? That one of your extras, too?
[ a huff of amusement. ]
no subject
Kind of? But it’s — tactile. If I touch you, uh, anything could come through. No matter how deep you’ve buried it, so. Careful when you pass the potatoes, I guess.
[ a door is a door is a door. ]
no subject
[ feels better to be honest, anyway, considering he's just had a listen in on his thoughts. he tries to ignore all others, but the emotions still come across. he'd open his mind to him now, if it weren't for the creep of that dark, curious thing in the boy's mind.
all the same - bob will feel a wave of shame, the closes thing he can get to a mental apology. ]
You can't control it? What passes through touch?
no subject
[ trust has to be earned and re-earned again over time, fuck-ups, high stakes shit. ]
It’s — I mean, I don’t know why I’m being like. [ another fidgety gesture louis can’t see, meaning avoidant. ] You can probably see it in there, right? It kicked Koby to the curb, when he went spelunkin’. Guess you and Armand both have hall passes.
[ a pause, for that to settle. koby’s powers are known and understood to be quite strong, so maybe that gives louis a better indication of what he’s dealing with. (and a possible theory as to why creatures that have accumulated lifetimes of pain would be welcomed into the snare.) ]
Armand says it looks like scar tissue. I think of it as, as my shadow. Got a teacher to see if there’s any — working with it, but for now, uh, it’s a little. A bit of a hostile situation?
[ clearing his throat. ]
Anyway, it’s looking for what hurts. The stuff you can’t forget.
no subject
I see it. Feel it more, though. Not showing me its teeth, but it's not exactly friendly, either. Can't say I'd be any different if you went spelunkin'.
[ but it does mean he opens his mind a little, cautious. if it tried to kick back koby, then he's curious. curious enough to know what could hurt those he loves, and what bob has that could protect armand at his worst.
there's no pressing, but there's the faintest acknowledgement to the dark, swirling thing there at the back of bob's mind. like knows like when it sees it, in a way. ]
Scar tissue makes me think it's dead, or healed. Your shadow feels more alive than that. Especially if it's going out looking for things all the time.
no subject
Yeah, uh, turns out there’s a lot to eat around here.
[ for a vampire of another kind. and it’s had — adam’s grief, embry’s sorrows, corry’s past — armand, armand, armand — all in addition to bob’s own agonies, trotted out as and when it fuckin’ suits. maybe it’s more alive than it was in november, even with the horrors of the commune nipping at its heels. maybe it wasn’t so close to bob back then, but now it’s right there, overlaying his frame. ]
Still wanna have me for dinner?
cw: war trauma
it's brief, the sound of an air raid overhead, or the feeling of dirt in his earsnosemouth as he hid from the sun, the way blood made him run colder then. it comes as quickly as it goes. ]
There's no shortage.
[ a huff again, something musical and easy, put on. ]
Pretty sure you said our fangs won't make a dent, so I think I'll stick to having you as good company instead.
cw vague refs to self harm
the lack of fear in louis both surprises him and doesn’t. armand had been the same — is the same still. bob wonders if they don’t want for it sometimes. the shard of glass in hand. the pressure on a bruise. fingers in an old wound. proof of life, in the agony. bob can understand that instinct, after honing it himself all by his lonesome. ]
Hah, I’ll take that deal. [ with a light laugh, the darkness recedes. ] And be on best behaviour, promise. Keep the shadow and the, uh, sun to myself.
[ the two sides of him, light and dark, as armand likes to put it. ]
no subject
No one ever warned you about making deals with vampires, huh?
[ a snort, more genuine now that he can breathe a little. ] Best behavior's not mandatory at these things, so best not to worry about it. You'll see for yourself.
[ seriously, wait until you get to see all three of them in a room together, bob, so normal! ]
no subject
You think good judgment got me here? C’mon, Louis.
[ suped up with uncontrollable power, walking into a dinner with three apex predators — nah. if the sentry trial hadn’t snapped him up, he’d probably be the kind of idiot who begs to be made a vampire. or at least the guy who takes that ill-advised trip to a second location and ends up in a ditch. ]
I’ll try to, uh, read the room. [ a teensy burst of nerves. ] Am I supposed to bring anything? Never been to a dinner party outside Portia’s.
[ way above his paygrade. ]
no subject
[ or more that lestat and armand pick and poke and claw at one another until it escalates. usually louis just sits and watches, or placates one over the other. ah, his ill-tempered lover (ex-lover? lestat. ill-tempered lestat). ]
Just bring yourself. It's not a party so much, just a way for us to keep in touch. I'll make sure the kitchen gets us a spread.
[ another flush of warmth that feels far less supernatural and infinitely more human in a way that vampires shouldn't. but it's there - like a grip of a hand on a shoulder, a soft squeeze and shake, the bump of an elbow to an arm. like two men walking side by side down the sidewalk in the sun. ]
Speaking of - go eat something, it's past lunch time.
🎀